It's Always the People

Today is a very sad day for me. My Nana passed away 1 year ago on February 22nd, 2020 and my Pop-Pop passed away 3 months ago on November 22nd, 2020. They were married for 63 years and raised me to be the man that I am today. I miss them tremendously. If you are interested, check out the podcast episodes where I read the eulogies for each of my grandparents. My Nana - It Was All a Blur, My Pop-Pop - Tribute to My Father. I don't want to make this episode about me and the grieving I'm still doing. I wanted to share an important mindset shift that I hope you hear loud and clear.

Have you ever been on a vacation to a gorgeous, picturesque location? Of course you have. Do you take pictures? Let me give you some examples and see if you relate. Teresa and I took our kids to the Philadelphia Zoo a number of times. When we browse the pictures a few weeks later, there are countless pictures of elephants, eagles, and giraffes, yet only a few with my kids in it. Worse yet. There's barely any of Teresa or I as we're the picture takers. We've gone to the beach, the mountains, the amusement parks, and the museums. We were in the moment with our family and excited to be at this location. So I took tons of pictures of the scenery and the rides and shells. Sure, I took a bunch with the kids too. But there weren't many of Teresa or I. As I think back, we had other important people with us on many of these trips. My mom and dad, Teresa's mom, my sisters, my grandparents, dear friends to name a few. But where are the pictures with THEM in it? Oh, there's one out of 50. I took my Nana and Pop-Pop to an Independent Living Facility for a tour in December 2018. In fact, it was my Nana's dream to live in this particular one, so I took her. I have videos of every possible room combination as my goal was to get footage to show Nana and Pop after. I focused on the rooms, not the people in the rooms. We had Christmas with many family members a few weeks later. I have pictures and videos of the kids tearing up the presents, but hardly anything of the most special people sitting on the couches and chairs watching it. Among those people were my dad, my Nana & Pop, my uncle, Teresa's mom, and us. I could go on and on. You get the point. After my Nana died a year ago, I was searching for recent pictures and videos of her to hold on to her memory. I had little. Really, I just had the videos from the tour and Christmas. I'm so thankful that I did a pan of the room in each case because I got footage of my cherished and missed grandparents. But the video was from 14 months prior! I had nothing at all for 2019! Why?! 

​Here's why! We live in the moment with the people we love the most. When we capture images, we have an incorrect mindset to capture the moment by capturing what we've looked at. Another way to put it is this. We're capturing the main object of the moment, like the opening of Christmas gifts. We're not capturing the moment with the people. I want to impress upon you how fragile life is. It can vanish in a vapor. Those that you love are not always going to be here. Yes, take pictures and videos of amazing views. But focus instead on the amazing people with you. Capture them. You won't regret it. What if you lose one of your family members or dear friends like I have and you don't have the images to go back to? Live in the moment with the people you love and focus your camera on the people. It's always the people! I promise you that!

I learned my lesson and took lots of pictures and videos of my Pop-Pop during the pandemic and 9 months he outlived his bride from February 23rd to November 22nd, 2020. I even have audio and video recordings during his 26 days in the hospital. In these audio recordings, he tells me how much he loves me and how he wants to be remembered and how he wants his estate to be divvied up. I have that forever and can listen to my father talk to me whenever I want. I am so thankful to have these memories. I'll end this podcast with a clip from one of these recordings. Remember this message and start living in the moments that truly matter.